CENSORED dialogue Will Not Be Censored
Photography provided by CENSORED dialogue
As someone who grew up within the post-internet era of music for the majority of my life, as an avid music listener and writer, I have to admit that I often wish that I had gotten to experience the peak days of when the discovery of new music relied on arguably more engaging modes such as swapping zines and MTV. Though, regardless of my nostalgia for a time less dependent on algorithms, I continue to be amazed at how discovering new artists is just a tap away on my phone. Thanks to the internet and more specifically social media, I’ve come across a handful of talented DIY artists ranging from all different types of genres and cities–even when I’m not even particularly on the hunt for new music.
An artist in particular that I’ve been blessed to have come across via scrolling through my Twitter timeline is Austin, TX based artist CENSORED dialogue. As a child, CENSORED dialogue grew up with the confidence of knowing they wanted to make music. Around the ages of eighth and ninth grade, they began writing songs as a means of coping with their toxic home life. As their writing style developed, they continued to make music on and off between their teenage years and early adulthood as they dealt with life and taking the time to transition in 2018. Now, in 2021, CENSORED dialogue released their debut album, Afro Pessimist –a blunt and unapologetic project that explores issues of race, gender, mental health, and how they often intersect. Produced by themselves and fellow producer and vocalist Chloe Hotline, CENSORED dialogue preaches love and acceptance across the album–quickly proving themselves to be a rockstar to keep tabs on.
Congrats on the release of your debut album–it was so amazing to see all the love it was receiving online! How have you been feeling now since its release?
I’ve been feeling good! I’ve really been coasting and relaxing honestly. Just soaking it in. Still surprised that Fantano retweeted the damn thing. I feel really blessed with all the feedback, which is surprising because this project was a huge risk.
Considering how cutthroat the music industry can be in regards to getting your foot in the door, you’ve successfully managed distributing your own music, building a fanbase, and have even started booking shows all without a manager or backing from a major label. Based on your own experience, what are your thoughts on staying independent as an artist?
It’s definitely a lot more work, but I think it’s worth it overall. I know all this hard work is gonna pay off, and it’s nice to know that I get to be as authentic as possible through the process. I refuse to give up creative control, and, as long as I’m independent, I don’t have to.
It’s kinda amazing how big of a role the internet actually plays in our discovery of music. Like, it’s wild to think that an app like Twitter has led me to find so many great DIY artists like yourself. As someone who’s active in online communities and has even collaborated with people you’ve met online, would you say that the internet has played a positive role in your music career?
Absolutely. Twitter is the reason I know 99% of my artist homies. Twitter is the reason STKHM exists. Twitter is the reason CENSORED dialogue is able to successfully exist.
You had previously briefly touched on the difficulties you encountered during the process of making Afro Pessimist, specifically on the track Wishing Well. When did the concept for the album first start to develop and what were some of those difficulties you had to overcome in the process?
Hahaha, so I used to go to Baylor University, which is this super conservative baptist university in small town Texas. It fucking sucks. Good school, terrible institution. Anyhow, the first semester of my senior year there, this kid essentially called me a nigger and nothing was done about it. I went all the way up judicial affairs and everything. I had already experienced a tremendous amount of racism, homophobia, and transphobia, but that was kinda the straw that broke the camel’s back. As far as difficulties go, I had to realize where my limits as a new producer were, and Chloe was a huge help in helping me fix a lot of my drums on the first half of AP. Also, I went through a rough ass breakup while working on this album, which kinda made me give up on making art entirely for a bit. It kinda ended up being a blessing in disguise though, because that’s when I brought Chloe in to help me finish this thing.
Between you and Chloe Hotline, both y’alls sample games are wild on this project! Between all the soul samples and that sharp sound heard throughout ACAB, I was wondering if there were any other interesting or weird samples that you wanted to talk about that you think listeners might have overlooked at first listen?
Thank you! All the samples were relatively obscure, so I don’t wanna say too much. These days sample snitching can get you a cease and desist. What I can say is the weird ass sharp sound on ACAB is a stock Ableton flute loop that I distorted a bunch to give it that crunchy sound. I love telling people that haha.
Throughout the album, you explore intersectionality in connecting your experiences of racial discrimination with your gender identity. In a world that continually silences black, queer artists, do you often find yourself turning to music as a way to navigate and voice these realities of yours?
Yeah for sure. My whole life music and writing was my primary coping mechanism. I’m kinda a unicorn in this rap shit as a Black transfemme though, so there’s not a lot of people I can turn to for consolement. I listen to a lot of Chloe Hotline, Backxwash, Titmouse, and Kunt Pills because those are friends who are in the same lane, but for the most part I use music as a personal outlet.
Myself, as well as I'm sure other listeners, really appreciated your candidness lyrically on the album in regards to mental health. During the writing process for the album, did you ever find difficulty in being as open as you were with your listeners about a topic that is still arguably considered taboo?
Fuuuuck no. Tyler, the Creator, Kid Cudi, Earl Sweatshirt, Mac Miller, and Childish Gambino all made very personal, honest music related to mental health that made me feel like I wasn’t alone. If it wasn’t for Goblin, Man On The Moon 1 and 2, I Don’t Like Shit I Don’t Go Outside, FACES, and Because the Internet, I wouldn’t be alive. Those albums genuinely saved my life. I put the knife down many times because of those albums growing up. I think I owe it to kids to bare that same honesty in my music, and it’s worked. I’ve had a good amount of people reach out and tell me I saved their fuckin life with my music, so that’s the reason I keep doing this. It’s easy for me when I see them kinda results.
What’s next for CENSORED dialogue?
In the concrete, I wanna get some fashion projects off the ground and prolly an Afro Pessimist Deluxe Edition. In the abstract, I’ve been focused on bettering myself. Enjoying the company of my friends more. Getting sober. At the time of writing I’ve been clean for a week, so I’m stoked about that.